


The Scars, Physical, Mental and Metaphorical

by Refling



Category: Just Shapes & Beats (Video Game)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Cube is a therapist, Everyone Is Complicated and It Shows, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, humanization, postgame
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-08
Updated: 2020-07-08
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:34:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25145509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Refling/pseuds/Refling
Summary: "It's Over" doesn't always mean "Full HP". There are scars left to heal, and some of them will hurt.
Comments: 3
Kudos: 30





	The Scars, Physical, Mental and Metaphorical

**Author's Note:**

> This is an extent of me imagining humanized shapes, so come check out the concepts! https://twitter.com/RefArts1/status/1280800709898907648

The scars are itching.  
Blixer rolls around in his cave, groaning and trying to scratch his head. A small beam of light appears from somewhere, jumping into his eye, and the cat monster hisses, trying to curl away from it. He cannot just sleep peacefully, can he?  
At least he had his cave to hide. The one he was hibernating in before all this started. He didn't think he would need the cave, or even to sleep, after all-night long party, but when the sun rose... It was suddenly reminding him that he's living now in the world that wasn't welcoming to creatures like him. To red, primordial ones. And no amount of friendliness would keep him from remembering that.  
It was so much easier when there was no world.  
Blixer sighs, shifting again and scratching the scars.  
It's not like there was a chance for him before the world. He, kinda, ended himself then. He always ended up ending himself, and the scars... there were lots of them. Blending into the tattoos, hiding beneath the clothes... but the most prominent one still remained the most visible and itched the most. The one from the time he thought he could reach the sky - and fucked up harder than ever.  
Ha. Haha.  
As if any amount of sleep could save him from his memory.  
Fucking world.  
Blixer scratches his shoulders, staring into darkness. He wonders if Cyan ever sleeps. They must be tired of all this, too, and yet they're always here, fixing something. It's probably just Blixer's problem, then? But why should it be his problem?... Argh.

His thoughts get interrupted by sliding sound, then soft steps. A little less soft than Cyan's. Somebody of the hills' residents? Seems so.  
"Can't you tell I'm sleeping?!" Blixer roars, shifting further from the visitor. The steps approach; he can see the glow of the small triangles now.  
"You don't look like sleeping," Cube walks around and sits down in front of him. Blixer shuts his eye, covering it with a hand.  
"Then why can't you just go and let me do the thing?"  
"Thought you might need a talk," the voice is unsure and quiet, but surprisingly soft. He sighs.  
"Argh. What makes you think so?"  
He feels a gentle touch - seems like Cube put their palm on his head. He almost shivers. Not many choose to touch him - though he's devoid of Triangle power now, folks still know red can burn.  
"You know... I remember being red myself. We don't talk about this usually, but I still do," they whisper. Blixer opens his eye a bit, giving Cube a questioning look. Yeah, he corrupted a bunch of Plants those days, but... them, too?  
"I do remember what you feel while being red," they continue awkwardly. "That's why I came."  
Blixer snickers. "Yeah yeah. And what's so different in being red?"  
Cube sighs, glancing away.  
"You know... I felt things stronger than ever. I felt like everything was in my hands. And yet... I remember always feeling mad. At others, at world... and at myself when I began thinking maybe it's not their fault. And I couldn't control this, so I hid and pushed others away." Cube reaches with their other hand, touching Blixer's. "That's why you hide, right? Because you're mad?"  
They're disturbingly fucking right. Blixer sighs.  
"Fine, you got it. What now? Gonna sit there until I punch you?"  
"That's what Cyan did for me," Cube shrugs. "I was crying and pushing them away, and yet they stayed," they start humming quietly, "close to me, close to me, close to me~" And in response to their own words, they shift closer to Blixer, keeping their hands on his head and arm. It somehow feels infuriating and calming at the same time.  
"So you think you can magically, um, fix me? Make me one of you?"  
Cube waves his head.  
"No, no no. You're not broken... not anymore," they give a pained look at the Blixer's scar; weird, why would it bother them? "I just want you to have someone when you're mad... to feel easier or something. Maybe that'll help you sleep... or if you don't really want to, you can tell stories if you wish? About what was before the world, or..."  
"I guess I do want to sleep," Blixer sighs. All this conversation feels weird as hell, but he doesn't feel like cutting it short, as he usually does. "I just can't. And not because of some stupid madness or something... just this thing on my head. It's not comfortable."  
"Oh!" Cube smiles lightly. "I can fix that..." They take their hand off Blixer's head, touch one of the triangles, and a faint rainbow glow fills the air for a second. Then, Blixer feels a gentle touch on his scar again.  
"Is that better?"  
It really is. The itch is fading away, slowly but steadily, and Blixer thinks for a second, no wonder the Tree left this creature some healing powers. He nods slightly and curls again, hiding from the light. Now, when the discomfort is going away, he's probably gonna get rid of other thoughts quickly.  
"Don't mind if I stay here?" the soft voice sounds concerned, and Blixer almost snorts.  
"If you like to stare at sleeping people. Just keep it low and don't sing, or you'll get a tail slap."  
He closes his eye again, and Cube stays quiet, leaving the only, almost voiceless word.  
"Sure."

***

The sun looks happy today, slightly more than usual. Cyan greets it, before sitting down beneath the Tree and closing their eyes. Such a great day to rest. The valley seems happy, and there's nothing to fix.  
Boat said yesterday he found a new cave, full of water and mushrooms, and is going to investigate. That sounded... unexpectedly pleasant. So the world is still expanding? Cyan smiles. Who knows what lives there, at the farthest lands where no one from the hills ventures? Maybe new lifeforms?  
Anyway, Boat's not going to return today, so Cyan just closes their eyes and rests in the waves of wind. Their mind is wandering, and nothing is happening for a long time.

Then, a voice arrives, slightly familiar yet unknown.  
"Hey... Cyan?"  
Cyan opens one eye, looking at the figure standing in front of them. The sunlight blocks the view, and so they cannot quite grasp who is the stranger. At least, they're... the same size?  
"Hmm... have we met before?" Cyan asks sleepily, trying to focus.  
"Wow, that's rude. Don't you remember me? Us? Us four?" the figure asks, confused. Cyan blinks again, looking at the creature. Colored in sunlight, with the yellow triangle on their shirt, and the same scarf as theirs, but yellow, too...  
And they suddenly remember. A distant memory shines, reminding them of something from long before the world, even before they woke up in the void.  
"Of course... Yell," Cyan smiles lightly, and their long-lost sibling gives off a short laugh.  
"Finally. Did something hit your head? You look weathered."  
"And you're fresh, like just born," Cyan shrugs. Yell grabs their hand, helping to get up.  
"I am, technically. Your world expanded enough for us to come here. You're doing great!" They smirk, looking around, and Cyan realizes.  
"Us? You mean, Orange and Penta are here, too?"  
"Of course," Yell nods. "Care to meet?"

They're indeed here, staring at the Plants, bouncing and waving around the hills. Cyan notices they're looking unusually bright - too bright for this pastel, blue-ish world. It's easy to notice these three weren't here when the world was forming.  
Who knows, maybe the expanded territories will have the yellow, orange, or green colors in their palette?  
"Oh, you found Cyan!" Penta turns around, and then so does Orange. They stare at each other for a moment, and then approach for hugs. Cyan feels a bit awkward; they notice Yell smirks, too. Huh. When they were together, they recall, Yell always wasn't a hugging type. But Cyan themselves was one. Did- did they change that much?  
"Nice world out there, pal!" Penta exclaims, looking around. "Really, it's gorgeous. And the Tree... Yeah, you're the lucky one."  
"And no red matter anymore... Guess we're late to the party," Orange adds jokingly. Cyan gives them a curious look.  
"And you'd want to...?"  
"Of course yes! Well, I mean, it can hurt, but... I can't believe you did all of this alone while we missed all the fun!"  
All three laugh a bit, until, one by one, they notice Cyan's grin - and stop.  
"Wait, you mean..."  
"There is someone red here, and he's partying every night," Cyan delivers it in the most innocent tone they're capable of. "So, if you insist..."  
"You mean, we can go kill ourselves?" Yell asks suspiciously. Cyan snorts.  
"Course not! The Tree's doing it's job, you know. It may hurt a bit, but it's safe. And that red one - he's not that bad if you don't try to piss him off. So feel free to join tonight."

***

Blixer finishes tuning up his stand and pauses for a bit. Not all the Plants are here yet, and overall, the place seems pretty empty. They said, Boat will be missing today... so even less listeners. Blixer silently sighs.  
He wonders why is Cyan always missing. Sure, the first time they were resting from everything that happened, and several times he heard them going out and cleaning the mess... but they didn't show up even a single time. Why would they hide? Blixer feels uncomfortable assuming this, even though he cannot quite grasp what type of thought bothers him.

And suddenly, something changes in the party area.  
Blixer catches everyone's stopped doing things and is looking behind him. Helicopter even seems to jump excitedly, and Blixer becomes curious, too, and looks around.  
Several small people are approaching the party valley. It's, unexpectedly, Cyan - and who are they bringing along? Those three look quite similar to them - but possess another, unfamiliar bright colors. Blixer chuckles. So at least the universe isn't all about reds versus blues. Good to know.

"Oh. My. Triangles!" Cube gasps, as the quartet approaches. "Cyan, there - there are more of you? And they're so bright! I'm..." they hide their face in their hands, looking through fingers. Cyan laughs quietly, tapping them on the back.  
"Hey, hey, no one bites here. Those are Yell, Penta and Orange, and they came to visit me, and... consider them my siblings."  
Cyan had siblings? Blixer would never guess that.  
"Don't forget to note - older siblings!" the one named Orange exclaims, and Cyan nods with a sigh.  
"Nice to meet y'all! You are all Cyan's friends, right?" the Penta one goes for greeting Cube and Helicopter, and the Yell one turns Blixer's way. Blixer looks back, squinting suspiciously.  
"Hey hey, you must be that red one Lil Cyan mentioned!" Yell finally approaches, studying his look and DJ stand with curiosity. "So you're the one who does parties here, right?"  
"Um, yeah," this type of approach is new to him. "The name's Blixer. Blixer Fresh."  
"You don't look like "fresh"," the small yellow brat smirks. Blixer bares his teeth slightly.  
"Oh, shut up. So what do you want from me?"  
"Cyan said you can make a red shapes party for us!" Orange approaches too, giving him another curious look. Blixer glances at Cyan with disbelief. Oh, really? You did say that?  
"Well, you are an artist in creating red shapes," Cyan shrugs. "I kinda walked into ton of beautiful things during the, um... accident. Thought my guys would like it, too."  
"The accident?" Penta glances at Blixer and Cyan worriedly, and the cat monster doesn't like the implication of that look. "What happened here?"  
Blixer stands up, ready to defend himself, but Cyan just turns around.  
"Nothing."

"...Oh wow, Cyan was right! Those beats are awesome!" Penta swirls around, moving between flashing red lasers.  
"Yeah, you cannot really stop dancing, when everything around goes red and tries to kill you," Yell laughs, joining the rhythm. Blixer smiles widely, tapping his stand and focusing on transforming beats into bursts of red matter.  
Cube and Helicopter are at the dance floor, too, though it's visible this is not their kind of party. They seem to like their new guests, and Blixer hears Helicopter even managing to talk to Orange.  
"...and so they made landing pads everywhere, even in that cave I never go to! I asked them to take a rest, but you know Cyan: what needs to be done should be done, so no worries, I'll make it work!"  
"Never thought Cyanie would be such a workaholic," Orange giggles.  
"Hey, you talking buddies!" Blixer yells mockingly, mixing in more beats. "If you're able to chatter out there, it's not enough for you!" And the glowing spheres at the dance floor turn into rotating flower-like forms, shooting projectiles. Yell doesn't catch the rhythm properly, and one of the "petals" burns them, making them jump away.  
"Ouch, that hurts!" - but the burn fades away instantly, glowing in white. "Hey, lil Cyan, your Tree is really doing a good job!"  
Blixer glances at Cyan, and his smile fades away a bit.

That's what was worrying him. Today, Cyan's not fixing any stuff, and not resting. They're just here, watching the party from the distance. But they don't join in.  
Why don't they join in?  
That looks too... fishy. Cyan let him have those parties, brought their family to have fun, even called Blixer a good artist. What could be wrong? How could one say those words about a thing and still not like that thing?  
Or maybe, Cyan wasn't sincere about all of this, Blixer thinks.  
"What needs to be done..." What if Cyan is friendly to him just because they think that's what is needed? Maybe they don't even really mean it. Maybe they don't like him at all.  
Or maybe that's just some random shit from his head. Cube said something about madness, and Blixer doesn't tend to believe, but who knows. Maybe today's the case.

Meanwhile, the flowers on the dance floor turn into shooting stars, and their traces slowly fade away, just to be replaced with another projectiles - looking like starry sky altogether.  
"Hey, this one's extremely pretty," Cyan calls from their place. "Never saw those before."  
"If you like it, why don't you join in?" Penta turns to their sibling, almost misses another star - and dashes through it. Cyan slightly waves their head, taking a step back.  
"Hey, what's wrong? Maybe we wanna see your moves, too!" Orange whines playfully, and Yell joins them.  
"Yeah, please~ We're not the only ones to fail miserably at this, are we?"  
Cyan sighs, looking not so joyful anymore.  
"Maybe you'll just leave me alone?"  
Yell jumps out of the dance floor, approaching Cyan. Blixer cannot see properly from that distance, but it seems like they're grabbing their sibling's hand.  
"Come on, don't make us wa-" - Cyan dashes out, acting frustrated.  
"I said that shitload of times, don't make me do things!"  
"Ooooh, Lil Cyan needs to wash their mouth," Yell teases. Cyan turns around, their cape flapping in the air.  
"And Big Yellow needs to shut the fuck up! I'm out. I'm by the Tree, see you when the party's over."  
They walk away so fast, Blixer cannot even react properly. He keeps mixing sounds, seeing as others shrug and return to dancing. He just doesn't bother anymore to keep a smile on his face.

So he was right.

Everything was fine until they called Cyan to join in. Then, such an aggression... Yeah, Cyan definitely doesn't like these parties. And Blixer. And probably even hates him. No wonder, after all this war... which you tried to call an "accident", right, Cyan? You're just lying. Lying to everyone.  
The rhythms start getting more erratic and hard-to-get, but Blixer doesn't care.  
They never wanted him around, just kept being polite. No one wanted, actually. Cube is physically unable to hate, and the Plants are dumb enough to burn with a smile... but all they know who he is. A red one, means a bad one. No one will ever forgive him.  
Even those three... They're only having fun because they're new here. Because they never met a true red, without insta-healing. Would they like him if they met him earlier? Or is it all because of Cyan's lies?  
There's only one way to know.  
Blixer taps the stand, and the dance floor turns into mayhem.

***

Cyan wakes up when the Tree starts vibrating. They jolt up, looking around. The holiest symbol is glowing, like an unknown energy is trying to reach out - and fails.  
And the party zone is flashing with reds.  
Oh fuck.  
Cyan doesn't even think much, just dashes forward, trying to get there as fast as they could. If Blixer is in boss mode... Fuck, what could have happened? Everything was okay when they left...  
Did they miss anything?

They stop right in time to not fall face first into the spherical red barrier, surrounding the valley. Right, the Tree cannot do anything, he should have shielded the zone... and it's probably thick enough to not dash through.  
But they can't afford not to try.  
What needs to be done, should be done.  
Cyan sighs and dashes into the red burning mass.  
 _One._  
It hurts, extremely hurts, but the moment of pain lets them move forward. Cyan steps out of the barrier - and barely avoids being hit with a projectile ten times their head.  
What the...  
All the dance floor burns. Lasers are everywhere, spikes are flying chaotically, hitting the walls of the shield and bouncing away. Some sort of screeching, trembling music fills the remains of air. It's not a party anymore - it's battlefield.  
"Cyan!!!"  
They move swiftly between the explosions, trying to find the voice owner. Cube appears to stand near the wall, holding Orange in their hands, shielding Penta from projectiles.  
"It... hurts..." Orange whispers. Cyan approaches - seems like they took three or four hits, of course it would hurt. Penta seems to be more lucky, but they're scared - and that's enough.  
"Cyan! What are you-"  
"No time," they interrupt Cube. "Where's Yell?"  
"Inside that hell," they whisper. "Heli's trying to help them, but..."  
Cyan looks at the place that used to be the dance floor. That looks like hell indeed - even more red flashes than near the barrier.  
"I'm going inside."  
Cube gasps. Penta almost screams.  
"Cyan, no! There's..."  
"Blixer. Someone's gotta talk to him."  
Their sibling tries to catch their arm, but to no avail. Cyan braces themselves - and steps inside.  
Lasers shoot from the floor, almost as if feeling someone's presence.  
 _Two._

"Blixer!" they raise their voice, trying to figure out where the cat monster is. It's hard to move forward - every step causes things to burst, every second something flies by, making Cyan dodge or try to step aside. But the sounds grow louder, and that means something.  
"Blixer!!!"  
"What's up? Got here to put me in my place again?!"  
Cyan finally sees him - still at his stand, creating those terrible, painful noises, bending the matter around them to the music. Here's Yell and Helicopter, too - both seem wounded, and Cyan feels they need to get both of them out, quickly.  
"Blixer, what are you doing?" they scream, moving forward steadily. Blixer raises from the stand, holding something - Cyan recognizes one of his guns.  
"Just showing your friends the things you liked so much!" he yells, wrath and desperation in his eye. "You said you liked them, right? So much you left when invited!"  
Oh shit.  
Did they trigger him with that?...  
"Blixer, we need to talk..."  
Another projectile hits them in the shoulder, causing them to trip - but they're closer to Yell and Helicopter this way.  
 _Three._  
"I'm done eating your lies!!!" Blixer almost roars, firing his gun into the ceiling. The bullets ricochet; some of them move towards Cyan's friends, they cannot choose wisely, they're not sure Yell's gonna take another hit well -  
Cyan dashes between them and danger.  
"Get out of here, you two. As fast as you can."  
 _Four._  
"Oh, what's wrong? You did recommend them these parties!" Blixer laughs, pain audible in his voice. "Reds are just fun and games, when you hide their properties with your tree, right? When you say to everyone that nothing is wrong with me, but you know, oh you know, and you hate me, you just can't say it out loud!"  
"Blixer, please listen to yourself," Cyan takes another step. "It's not you talking. It's your rage..."  
"What do you know about rage?!" he screams, and it almost hurts. Blixer's right. Cyan should have thought about it. They should have remembered that, from the Cube's corruption. Reds are bad at controlling their power when they feel things - and that power makes them feel even worse...  
"I may not know, but it's not you, Blixer. It's not what you are. Please stop. We can talk..."  
"STOP FUCKING WHAT? Stop being me?!" - he finally shoots directly at them, right into the chest. _Five._ Cyan barely keeps themselves from succumbing to the pain. There's too much pain already, but they can take a bit more. They have to move. Until it's too late.  
"You knew who you were inviting to your valley!" Blixer roars again, trembling with emotions. "You knew I won't change and magically become one of you! So why did you, then? To humiliate me? To have under your feet? You're all just hating me! Hating and fearing! You cannot even -"  
"Blixer."  
Cyan takes one last step - and looks into the monster's eye, trying to show him what they feel. His hand shakes - and Cyan dashes, holding it, almost hugging it, taking the gun's aim away.  
 _Six._

***

...He feels the touch in the moment he almost snaps. He doesn't even get anymore what he's trying to say, it's just fucking hurts inside. But the tiny hands hold his arm, suddenly so gently and carefully, and he manages to catch the look of cyan eyes.  
...no hatred?  
And then those eyes freeze wide open, as if Cyan was screaming, but they aren't. Their hands twitch, and they let go, and fall to their knees, looking at nothing. This feels wrong, what just happened, he didn't shoot again; Blixer drops his gun, but nothing changes, and then Cyan falls on the ground, breathless, unmoving.  
Wait...  
The music stops, and the red shapes fade, one by one. Blixer reaches out to the one he was just screaming the words of hate in the face.  
This cannot be happening. He knows it can't be; he tried so hard that time when he actually wanted to put the brat away. But they were always fine, no matter how much he attacked them, no matter how fast he chased them, they managed to avoid everything. But today he didn't try, he just wanted to be heard at last, and he needed to hear the truth, and fuck knows what else did he want, and...  
...he killed Cyan?...  
All the red shapes in the air are gone now, and he can feel everyone's eyes on him. Cube and Helicopter, frozen in horror - and some sort of deja vu? The trio, astonished, but not asking anything, probably not even grasping what happened. Even Plants seem to stop moving.  
No. No, no, no. He didn't mean to. He didn't want it to go like this.  
...what the fuck did he even want to achieve?

The barrier fades away the last, and suddenly everything is filled with white light. Of course, it's the Tree, Blixer thinks passively, looking at Cyan's body, he released them, and the Tree can finally do its job.  
He hears footsteps. The one called Yell approaches, avoiding eye contact, their hands trembling.  
"Cyan? You..."  
They kneel, touching Cyan's chest, but take their hand away instantly. They look at Blixer. He doesn't look back; it hurts…

And then wave of light goes through the lifeless body, and it twitches again. And again, and Cyan finally inhales, painfully, like someone who's drowning.  
"It's... not... over..."  
Their eyes blink rapidly as they try to take control of their own body, and then to get up - and it takes several long minutes, and it looks like torture. Blixer doesn't even notice when the others approach - just suddenly hears their gasps somewhere near, when Cyan makes it off the ground.  
"It's not over," they exhale again, looking at the ground.  
Blixer is unable to say a word.  
"It happened several times already," Cyan says quietly, just loud enough to be heard. "Most of them, you didn't remember. One time, you were unable to perceive."  
Blixer notices as Cube takes off their triangles, holding them in their arms. What does it mean? Was it... when he was... that thing?  
He killed Cyan several times already? And they... never talked about it? Never reminded him about this? And they still... chose to invite him here?  
"I'm... not lying to you," Cyan exhales. "We were at war then, I get it. I don't blame you. The past is in the past. And things that you create are... are really beautiful things. And beats, too. I really hate none of this. And I like that you have a chance to express this. But when I hear some of them, or when I get burned, I remember... those times. And I don't like to remember dying."  
Blixer is still speechless. Fuck, it turns out so complicated. What an idiot he was. Started simplifying, and projecting... again. And killed someone, again. How are they even talking to him so calmly?  
"Well... I just thought it was a me problem. And decided to just go away, and not to spoil the fun. Guess it didn't help, after all," Cyan raises their head, and Blixer, again, sees no hatred in their eyes. Just pain from what he just caused. "I'm... sorry, Blixer. For making you think I don't like you."  
And they turn around, and make a first step away from him. Blixer falls on his knees. His eye feels wet, and his scar is burning. Maybe it would be better if they just hated him after that. They had the reason to do so.  
What should he do?  
"Cyan, I... fuck, I'm..."  
They keep going away, and no one else seems to be moving. No one tries to reach out to them. Blixer is trembling.  
"Cyan, look, I'm sorry!..."  
"I know," they stop for a second, responding quietly. "I just need to go."  
Blixer watches helplessly as they walk away, hiding from his view. He feels he has to run towards Cyan, to express how he he didn't want this... But he doesn't have the strength to move, everything feels so shitty.  
He wants to punch himself.

"Hey..."  
Cube is here, again. Are they trying to coach them?  
"I'm sure they heard you. They're just not ready to respond now," Cube whispers, looking at him.  
"Because I hurt them," Blixer hisses, breaking eye contact. "I hurt fucking everyone."  
"I know, right?" Cube leans to him, and Blixer almost feels as if he doesn't deserve the touch. "I told you about being red and emotions. And... you're still emotional. You want them to forgive you, right?"  
Blixer waves his head. He doesn't fucking know. He just wants to get rid of the feeling he fucked up everything, again.  
"I... get it," Cube sighs. "When I was red, I couldn't control this stuff, but I know I was still in charge, and I kinda chose to hurt, and this... I'm not supposed to say those words, but... this sucks to know."  
Perfect description.  
"It always ends like that," Blixer sighs. "You're right, I'm a wreck, and... Say... do you think that I'll always be here doing shit? That I have no chance to do something fucking right?"  
Cube exhales deeply.  
"Well... I'm not sure I'm good at this, but I can try to help you work on it. And it's gonna be a long road. And I don't guarantee anything. I guess, we need to talk to Cyan, too. When they're ready to talk."  
"And you're sure they'll be ready?"  
Blixer isn't. The way that Cyan went away, it looked like... like it's over for him. For real. But Cube just shrugs.  
"One day they'll be. It just... won't be soon. You should, I guess... try to accept this, probably? I mean, you did hurt them, and everyone. Even me, to be honest..." They look away for a moment, and Blixer feels that disgust of himself again, and tries to take their hand away. Cube doesn't let go. "They'll need time to stop feeling mad about this, too. But Cyan... heh, they really care for everyone here. And about you. So I don't think they'll hold onto this longer than needed."  
Blixer nods solemnly. Cube faintly smiles to him, patting his shoulder.  
"Hey, you know what I thought? If that's not too much for you... what about going out of your cave and taking a look at what Cyan does? Maybe you could help with something, cause, you know, they'll always find a way to get overworked," they get slightly more serious for a moment. "But... how do I say it? Don't try to show them how good you are or something. Just... just try to care in return? So it, I don't know... won't be about you again?"  
Blixer gives them a puzzled look, then blinks, when understanding hits him.  
"Fuck, you're right. Again. How do you even get all these ideas?"  
"Those things on my head help a lot," Cube laughs a bit, then sighs. "Also, a bit too much of experience to start thinking about things. After being all that powerless and then harmful, I... try to care a lot, too. To avoid another mistakes."  
Blixer sighs loudly.  
"Guess I'm dumber than you, then."  
"You just have a long way to go," Cube responds quietly. "Are... Are you better? I need to check up Cyan, too. They're away for some time already," they look around for those who are gathering on the dance floor, and Blixer just notices there is a quiet discussion going for some time. "And look, Yell's missing, too. They must've gone after Cyan."  
"Oh." Blixer looks away. He's still angry at himself, and feels this weird desire to hide away, but he thinks he might try to face the shit he's done. "Yeah. Go if you wish. And, um..." - that's unusualfor him to say. "Thanks. That... that really gets to me."  
Cube smiles widely.  
"It's okay, Blixer. We'll handle this somehow," and they finally let go, and quickly follow the path to the Tree. Blixer glances at his arm. He feels... vulnerable. It smells of danger, and he's not entirely ready for this, but probably it's the way to get shit done.

Someone else approaches him. Blixer looks up to see Penta, fully healed from his things now, but still pale.  
"I- I didn't mean all of this..." He stutters. Penta nods, still looking afraid.  
"All this things... they happened because of something bad between you and Cyan, right?"  
He has no choice but to admit that, and so he nods. Penta sighs almost silently.  
"Could... could you please tell us? I need to know. Just to understand it all, I mean, I don't want to blame you, but... it's really important. Really."  
The thought about this hurts, too, and Blixer bites his lip and looks away. And then he starts to talk, uncertainly, in short phrases.  
After that shit he did to them, they deserve a confession.

***

Cyan almost falls at their usual place, near the Tree, and cross their arms. The usually pleasant glow of triangles envelops them, but the pain still isn't gone. It doesn't go so easily, Cyan just got used to working their way through it, ignoring it, but... that wasn't the case. They planned to relax today. Nothing bad was happening. They weren't ready to just go and die again.  
The worst part is, Cyan thinks, all this conflict could have been prevented.  
But it also shouldn't have existed to be preventable in the first place.  
Why is Blixer so... hard to deal with? It feels to Cyan like he would feel hurt no matter what's done for him. Like, no matter how much you care, it just breaks off his inner spiky shield. And why do you actually need to die for him to listen to you?  
Or not.  
Or maybe it's Cyan who took too much responsibility and can't handle it now.  
They sigh. Yeah, it surely wouldn't be better if they just let Blixer go away. The valley is more... complete with him, probably. But they just can't deal with his problematic attitude. They can't babysit him every time.  
Shit, why is doing the right thing so hard?...

A sound of quiet steps wake them from their thoughts. Cyan looks behind, mentally ready to ask the visitor to go away. But the one approaching is Yell, with strangely thoughtful look on their face, and Cyan decides to say nothing.  
"Care for a hug?" their sibling asks quietly, after several seconds of silence. Cyan gives them an unamused look.  
"So Big Yellow needs hugs too."  
"You need it too, don't deny it," Yell echoes, and Cyan gets up with a sigh, tiredly falling into their arms. They feel guilty as their hands touch the slightly torn yellow shirt. It was intact at the start of the day, unlike Cyan's. It should have stayed intact.  
"Sorry for all this mess. I didn't think it could go this way."  
"And sorry for teasing you," Yell responds quietly. "You weren't just having fun here. You went through a lot, now I get it."  
Cyan slightly chuckles.  
"Just several deaths and slightly more injuries, nothing serious."  
"Don't do this to yourself, Cy. I know you're hurting. We both know. Let yourself feel it."  
They both stay silent for several minutes, until Yell lets go. Cyan gives them another look.  
"How are you feeling?"  
"Could have been worse," Yell shrugs. "Your Helicopter friend was nice enough to protect me. I think Orange had it worse. But they seem okay by now, I don't know."  
Oh.  
"Orange and Penta are... still there, right?" Cyan points to the party area. Yell nods.  
"They were going to ask Catboy about that... "war" you mentioned. Hope they'll be alright, Penta's diplomatic enough for that stuff."  
Cyan frowns.  
"Not the best topic to discuss."  
"Come on, we just want to help," Yell tosses them gently. "It's not like you have to carry this all on yourself. Take a rest from him, we'll deal with it."  
"I'm not that weak," Cyan sighs and raises their eyes to the sky. It's still dark, and small triangles shine from above. "But if you insist, go forward. Just don't make my mistakes. It's enough for one to have them."  
Yell shrugs again and lies down at the grass, too. Cyan silently watches them looking at the sky.  
"You know... everything is still worth it," their sibling exhales quietly, and they close their eyes, content for now.  
"I guess so."


End file.
